a “local area” politician is saying something not very erudite to the press. (Local area, yep – this is the place where a shopping center is referred to as the Galleria Mall. Redundancy abounds in the vernacular.)

Previously, the record was held by the Honorable Jimmy Griffin, famous for two gaffs.  Interviewed during a snow storm while in Buffalo, Griffin went on tv to tell people to wait it out in style.  His advice: “Wait it out with a six-pack of beer and a football game.”  ‘Cause all good storms come to an end.

A separate storm had him on NPR, from Florida, talking about how Buffalonians are prepared for snowstorms and ready to wait it out.  This time, his suggestion was that the good people of Buffalo would be fine, since they could stay inside and “drink a bottle of chabliss.”  Yes, two syllables, chab and bliss.

This time around it’s County Executive Mark Poloncarz. He told The Buffalo News, who has since corrected an article quoting him, that in order to receive funding from FEMA, the storm had to be named.  And hence, this November storm is now called ‘Knife.’

The News’ revised language on Poloncarz statement:

Meanwhile, Erie County Executive Mark Poloncarz said county leaders are looking at the possibility of applying for federal disaster aid to help dig out. They have named the storm that’s killed at least six people “knife” because it cut “in the heart of Erie County.”

Although Poloncarz said the storm needed to be named to qualify for funding from the Federal Emergency Management Agency, officials with that agency say that’s not the case.

The lead to the article on the News website still has language leading into Poloncarz claim.  “The Lake Effect Storm . . .  has been named Knife.  The name was generated because local officials are looking at the potential for federal…”  Cue fade out, quick.

A query of the press desk at FEMA this afternoon before The News ‘correction’, once the FEMA official stopped laughing, led to the guidelines for declaring a disaster zone.
Per the page:

Primary factors considered include:

• Amount and type of damage (number of homes destroyed or with major damage);
• Impact on the infrastructure of affected areas or critical facilities;
• Imminent threats to public health and safety;
• Impacts to essential government services and functions;
• Unique capability of Federal government;
• Dispersion or concentration of damage;
• Level of insurance coverage in place for homeowners and public facilities;
• Available assistance from other sources (Federal, State, local, voluntary organizations);
• State and local resource commitments from previous, undeclared events
• Frequency of disaster events over recent time period.

No name needed.

The net – the best way to weather a storm in Buffalo? Be sure to have a Gwyneth Paltrow like name ready (Apple, Moses,  . . . Knife makes complete sense, right?) and a bottle Chab-bliss, or maybe some Shardonay.   But it really helps if you are in Florida.